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Christian talk personality considers quitting faith

"I'm just a guy standing in front of a god, asking him to love me."

By Mags Storey  |  Friday, October 22, 2010

Radio personality Drew Marshall is challenging God to make a personal appearance.

OAKVILLE, ON—Radio personality Drew Marshall has asked a lot of questions in his career. But none, he says, were more sincere than when he challenged God to make a personal appearance.

Comparing himself to a son longing for word from an absentee father, the host of JOY 1250's "The Drew Marshall Show" recently told leaders he is considering giving up the Christian faith he's held for 30 years.

"I want to believe," Marshall says. "I really do. I'm just at the point where hearing the story ain't good enough."

"The Drew Marshall Show," broadcast on CJYE, is heard by 100,000 people around Southern Ontario and by online listeners in more than 100 countries. Marshall first admitted he was doubting the existence of God during a radio interview with apologist Ravi Zacharias in July. After the show's summer break, he came back determined to be open about his spiritual quest, taking his listeners and guests with him.

But not everyone has reacted well to his honesty, Marshall says. Many of the listener responses have been critical, including one who wrote, "You should resign [and] Joy 1250 should stop carrying you and your show…Christianity is not easy but we strive toward the goal instead of crying about how hard it is…I pray you truly repent, humble yourself and start lifting high the name of our God, Jesus Christ, and leave Drew Marshall behind."

Since "coming out" as a doubter, Marshall has also had more than a dozen meetings with faith leaders.

"Some want to resave me," he says. "Some want to share their stories of doubt. Some want to just figure out where I fit in their theology."

Bruxy Cavey, pastor of The Meeting House, has joined "Drew's search for God," known in cyberspace as "Droogle" and is in ongoing, public discussion with Marshall over Twitter.

"U say God should reveal himself in a way you can't rationalize or explain away," Cavey tweeted recently. "Does that way exist? We're good at rationalizing. Remember, the gospels record certain people had personal encounters w Jesus' divine power and yet rationalized away the evidence." [sic]

Marshall says he grew up "doing church" and made a commitment to Jesus at Teen Ranch when he was 13. He later went on to become program director at Teen Ranch Canada, and then associate pastor at Glenbrook Baptist Church, He also attended Tyndale College and Seminary and Morland College in Australia. But, Marshall says, he never had an obvious, undeniable encounter with the presence of God.

"And I asked for it!" he says. "I honestly asked for it. Several times over. I'm at the point of saying that if God shows up and you somehow miss it or forget it, you must be thick!

"The number one thing that has ticked me off about this whole thing," he adds, "is when people say it's just a ratings booster. Or that I'm just doing something radical for the sense of being radical. This happens to be a big thing that I'm going through. It's a legitimate, 100 per cent bona fide journey that I've never been on before.

"I'm just a guy standing in front of a god asking him to love me."

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